We begin with a manly picture of our first profile in positive masculinity. I decided to start with someone who is only somewhat famous – really just a regular Scotsman who somehow became embroiled in a conflict with the man who would be SCROTUS. I came to know of my hero Mr. Forbes through Full Frontal – first in their piece on The Original Trump Haters, and then more fully in their Web Extra: Michael Forbes: Trump Kryptonite. If you are interested, you can go backwards in time and see that he has been featured in a couple of documentaries as well, including You’ve Been Trumped.
In brief, here is the story. Trump arrived in Scotland with the intent of building a golf course and started throwing his weight around – primarily the weight of his ego of course, and his presumption that money can buy anything. He received a classic Scottish warm welcome, being referred to as (apologies for the brogue):
a custard-flavored jobby, leather-faced piss jar, mangled apricot hell-beast, bawbag-eyed duck bumper, glaikit heidbanger, touped ducktrumpet, knuckle-braind fart lozenge, blinkered plum, huffy wee duckin bampot, utter cockwomble, degenerate corned beef face syrup wearing wankstain, rug-wearing thunder nugget, duckin walloper, uncooked pastry, hamster heedit bampot, duck-knuckle, rotten orange ducknut, onion-eyed flap dragon, wee orange rodent, mop-headed fud, cock-juggling thundercunt, witless ducking cocksplat, gerbil-headed, woodstained, and haunted spunktrumpet…
among other colorful terms. (And yes, I enjoyed listing all of those.) Like I said, classic Scottish hospitality extended to anyone of Trump’s stature. Surprising no one, Trump’s plans did not go well, and hit a solid wall of manliness when he came up against Michael Forbes.
Michael Forbes is a local farmer, part-time salmon fisherman and quarry worker who owned land that Trump wanted for his golf course. Trump demanded that Mr. Forbes sell the land, and Mr. Forbes told Trump to shove it. Many times. Went to court to say it, and won. Ultimately, Mr. Forbes would literally chase Trump surrogates from his land because he was tired of Trump’s nonsense and would have no more of it. This led Forbes to experience some, in my view quite well-deserved, fame. He has appeared in a couple of documentaries and has been interviewed many times.
A self-described shy person, Michael Forbes lives in his farmhouse with his mother and his wife Sheila. He stood up to someone who has successfully cowed the entirety of Republican leadership in the US and a large segment of Democrat leadership as well; someone who rode rough-shod over 17 other Republican candidates in the primaries; someone who has made a brand out of being intimidating and implacable in getting what he wants – the ultimate deal-broker who, if nothing else, can surely build a damn golf course in Scotland.
But no, turns out, he can’t. Because of Michael Forbes, today’s profile in positive masculinity.